Choosing to Wake Up

I collapsed. I fell. I lost myself in love drunk fantasies … in karmic delusions … in never-ending patterns of self-devotional laziness. Sabotage? Regret? Remembering the times when it was too late … When I crawled into the light just as the door slammed shut. Repulsion in the mirror, in an empty room. Nothing to…

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Waking Awaken, remember to your roots To the base of it all The full spectrum of every color red, blue, black lust, disgust, devastation all flavors every sensation beyond your training beyond your guru Through all the fierce, cloudy mirrors…comes Purity Emptiness Home Longing I want it all Every bit Flesh in my teeth Bone…

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Forever … in a moment, in a dream, in a thought, in a breath Never … in a moment, in a dream, in a thought, in a breath Let’s create this moment with our innocent remembering, our timeless gaze And erase it with the next breath Let’s build a dream with our pure desire, our…

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Devotion isn’t an action It’s a portal … A bridge between sensation and curiosity Linking form and void, life and death, love and hate Breathing, feeling, longing Owning my desire to be fully in this body, Stretched wide, my skin coats the universe, as it is held in the spaces between the stars I am…

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Field of Shakti

Raw and real Brave and scared A little girl curls up inside my heart as the priestess puts on her robes Rest in strong arms, restore with deep tears Mourn and honor every part of my feminine being, even as I find my way along the razor’s edge The deep masculine in and around me,…

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Death Is Love?

How do you write about love and death? I’ve been trying to wrap my head around how to share this latest adventure deep into the heart of Bali with Yuri, with many false starts … often getting stuck in this idea … is this a love story? Or is this a death story? When my…

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Letting go Diving in Let the tides take me inward Let the wind spread my ashes wide Whether you choose me or I choose me I will still be chosen And from there it will all disappear into itself Each cell a particle, each breath a miracle Reaching ever so far into the microscopic-ness of…

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Love Is Dead?

One intense Bali Valentine’s Day afternoon, I laid in my teacher’s arms, weeping from a deep sensation of purging romantic love from my system. Not love for one lover or another … the whole fucking concept. In my body, it felt like cells both gleefully jumping ship while others clang on for dear life, begging…

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A Glimpse (Bali Magic)

When love, curiosity, and a deep desire to integrate all personality shadows meet, miracles happen. Relaxation no longer means indulging on the lounge chair of life, sipping margaritas of ambivalence, letting life become dull and the body heavy. To relax is to let the tension have its way to the nth degree. To feel it…

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Be present with me. Be still. The deeper the silence stretches momentary eternities the more I feel the enormity of each precious millisecond in a vacuum, light travels so sweetly love breathes tender newborn baby breaths … tiny particles of exquisite miracles created by us, for us, and through us … singing everything there is…

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